I Didn't Choose The Game, The Game Chose Me...

Have you ever watched smog dissipate? I mean really stared at it? Until the very last wisps of air becomes so transparent you don't see it? If you pay close attention it never really goes away. If you pay really good attention and follow it there's always this murkiness to what you see through it. It's never quite clear again.

My life seems like that now. This illness that has robbed me of my son for the last  47 days has done this to me. So far it has taken 47 days and 47 lbs and it is still not done with me.

We didn't make it to the promise land today. We are still here "wading in the water"...

There's a hiccup. A really bad one that we don't know why.

A normal heart rate is between 60-100.

Jason's was 28. And it held for a little bit.

I'm not okay.