Every morning the team comes in, an attending with several residents and a fellow. They greet Jason good morning and ask him to squeeze their hands, look in their direction or move a finger. Sometimes he listens. Sometimes his movements are involuntary, as the swelling in his brain has still not subsided.
Today, like everyday I tried to get Jason's attention. Sometimes he locks eyes with me, but lately it is hard to tell a real follow of a command like "look at me" from his body just twitching and stirring of its own accord.
Today - Jason locked eyes with me. I could feel that he was there. His eyes held mine as I moved in closer and I asked him to squeeze my hand.
He did. Just my hand - not both as he usually does. I started to well up and I wanted to ask him questions he had to speak answers to. But with a mouth guard and ventilator in your mouth there is no way he could answer.
I looked into his face and asked the first thing I could think of.
"Jason if you can understand me can you raise one eyebrow?"
He smelled what the rock was cooking!
Jason raised one eyebrow and I started to cry.
I told him what I always do everyday - I explained that he is sick, and he is in the hospital and not to worry he was getting better. I told him that the medications were heavily sedating him and while I know he may be feeling really weird and confused not to worry because I am with him.
His eyes rolled back as they normally do now and he drifted off into a sleep.
But for a minute today he understood me after days of not knowing me.
He is not cured. This is not over.
But it is a step in the right direction.
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