This is the Part that Gets Hard...

Jason was woken up every two hours. He was incoherent. He did not respond properly. His head hung to the side and his eyes would roll in the back of his head. I immediately got the nurse, " I don't know why he is like that. He was not like that before."
"Get the doctor!"
The resident came. A sometimes cocky girl who I would have more than one exchange with before the weekend was out. "That's just part of the disease. It should be expected."
I trusted her. Not making any correlation between what the fuck a resident/fellow/attending might mean. This was a hospital - a real prestigious one. They would never let idiots make bad decisions, no one wants to get sued.
I learned that morning when the Doctor who brought us in saw him how wrong I was.
"Jason! Jason!" He sounded panic - and my heart was pounding in my chest.
"How long has he been like this!?!?!"
"Since yesterday! I asked the Dr and the nurse and they said it was the infection."
"Who was the resident on call last night?" He asked the group behind him.
"I mean, yes -" he began, " you can get like this with an encephalitis, but he was talking yesterday and he is on the anti-viral medication. He should be getting better - this is worse."
My heart sank. "let's continue the viral meds, let me check some of his tests."
I think this is when my stomach started closing. I sat there watching him. His eyes were rolling in the back of his head. He was just laying there unmoving. I couldn't breathe. I had to force myself. The nurse gave me a bag - but I wasn't hyper ventilating. I was watching him and begging God for help and cursing myself for not knowing the difference between a resident/and attending. WHY DID I TRUST THAT BITCH!?!?! He had been like this for hours!!!
then people came - visitors and we sat Jason up and tried to talk to him. Sometimes he was coherent which subdued the panic - then he went right back.
He had to take medication - and he refused to swallow. He laughed and would not focus his eyes and he needed to be carried back to his bed. He was looking around the room at nothing in particular. His behavior was crazy and consistent with someone that has brain damage. But according to all of his scans he is fine. They started a feeding tube that night - and that night I watched him again. I watched him sleep and I watched the monitor begin its Las Vegas style chimes and rings as it complained about the NEW Jason and what his body was doing. I was helpless. I was in shock. My façade was starting to crumble. There was a back and forth with a nurse who had issue with me questioning everything. There was issue with a resident who had to be explained Jason is not a science experiment or Patient Zero - he was MY SON. The tension was getting to me - but there is also a lot of bullshit going on to. I was protecting a medical anomaly. And here comes the class with all their alien probes Katy Perry E.T. background music.
My sword arm was aimed and ready. Mentally I was becoming unstable - but I was determined: Not my kid.